2016 in A Nutshell

2016 is coming to an end. Real. Soon.

It's about 2 weeks away until 2016 becomes a memory and a past. Scary isn't it?
It still feels like yesterday when I left College and brave the storm of coming home.
Home that feels so strange and new because I have been away for too long.
Let's be really honest here, 2016 has been a roller-coaster ride.
Coming home and working with your typical Asian parents is really something.
There is a gray area between being professionally related and family-bond.
Most times than not, they cannot be separated.
Suddenly, freedom is a luxury.
It's like your most precious possession being taken away from you.
I fully understand their worry as the kids who are not familiar with this dangerous third world country
besides, they have not seen us grow up and miss alot of our firsts since we left.
They had no idea how we survived many failures,
how as foreign students you faced so many unfamiliarity and yet struggle to find help.
Eventually, survived and stayed alive.

I remember crying every now and then before I sleep,
dreading waking up in the morning and facing yet another terrible day.
I am always a believer that life has its ups and downs and that better thing will come in light.
Until, I gave up.
I have never been so neurotic and pessimistic in my life before.
I was that girl who was pretty oblivious to her surrounding and yet leading a pretty content life.
I have friends who are always there for me and I used to run around wherever I wanted to go.
The change in me scares me a little too much.
It got to the point where I don't even dare meeting people because I don't even know who I am anymore.
Will they hate me now? Will they see the difference in me? (to the worse)

But everything has its own timing.
The second half of the year has been nothing but awesome.
Maybe it felt better than anything because life picks up when I lost hope.
Slowly but surely, the fights with my parents subside.
We came to terms that we need time to understand each other.
Imagine years of long distance relationship.. yeap,that is us.
I met old friends and new friends, people who returned from the same journey as I was.
We became a strong group of supporting pillars and now life feels like a breeze.
I have seen people who face worse things in life than me,
people who lost more than I thought I did,
and instead of whining about life, it's time to be the light for others.
It's gonna take time to move on from the life I hold so dear to me.
This is reality, this is Indonesia and working life.
Alhough I still miss Chipotle and Walmart a whole ton, I came to be glad for the nasi padang I can have anytime I want now.
For the luxurious malls that did not exist in West Lafayette.
I met people who made me feel loved, taught me to embrace the carefree life I have.
I hit the clubs, rave party, house party, bars, lounges. Nobody stops me, nobody judges me.
with that I learn how to be responsible of myself
and how to be selfless and remain thoughtful for others.

So to everyone that made my 2016 a memorable one, I am thankful.
Let's all embrace 2017 with open heart and a fresh new start.

Loves,

Lin



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